Cancer is a full time job

Gads, what a week. Monday I met with Dr. Beatty, officially now, my surgical oncologist. He's fabulous. I've decided to go forward with neoadjuvant therapy, which means, the chemotherapy will come first, before any surgery. I've also decided to participate in the I-Spy-2 protocol, also called a trial, or clinical study. I've always felt I haven't done enough for mankind, or in this case womankind, so if I can help find a cure by being a guinea pig, why not? What it means to me also, is in addition to the standard care, which is top-drawer at Swedish, I get extra attention because I'm involved in the trial. And get this - I just found this out yesterday from Barry (my new best friend - he's Dr. Kaplan's nurse oncologist and one of the two main coordinators for I-Spy-2 in Seattle) - I'm the first one in Seattle to be chosen for the study! So, I'm sort of a rock star! The reason is because 1.) a have a very large tumor that hasn't spread to other parts of my body, which seemingly came out of nowhere, and 2.) my markers (HER2neu positive, and ER, PR positive) are exactly what they are looking for in a candidate for the study. So, they're all over me like white on rice!
Tuesday was awful. Eight hours with doctors and/or techs of some sort. The morning started out at 7:30 - with no coffee or food - for the dreaded PET scan. Once again I had to drink gurp. I hate that shit so bad. Gives you gas and makes you poop like a goose all day. The PET is fascinating however. The machine reads every freaking cell in your body. Amazing. Everything is fine, no cancer anywhere else. From the PET I met with Dr. Kaplan, my medical oncologist, the one I love so much (he's got this whole Marcus Welby M.D. thing going on - he is so sweet, and highly respected - again, rock star). We talked about I-Spy, I met Barry, all good. Then I had to go back to First Hill Diagnostics for another ultrasound, this time on my right breast, just to be sure there was absolutely nothing there. Well, there's not, but the breast MRI did find another tiny spot in my left breast, the one with the big tumor. This one is the size of a pea, seriously. So, this absolutely wonderful Dr. Porter did a biopsy on that one. He's internationally known for breast imaging - I'm not kidding. He's another rock star! I watched on the ultrasound screen as he did it - kind of creepy, but again fascinating, because he had to be really precise to get a sample of that dude, and he got it perfectly. It was painless until he had to put a clip in, to mark where they took the sample, and that made me cry a little bit.
So, yesterday I saw Barry and Dr. Kaplan again, for bloodwork and yet another biopsy for the I-Spy trial. The trial pays for those, because they are in addition to standard care. This time it was a doctor Parikh who took the samples - five all told, from the big tumor - and he was great, too. Didn't hardly feel a thing. However, from two biopsy's in two days, old lefty looks like it's been in a bar fight!!
Today and tomorrow I'm off the hook, thank God. I need to get some work done! And, my little darling, Taylor, is coming to see me this weekend! He will get to meet Brad, which should be interesting.
Monday, I go back to First Hill Diagnostics for another breast MRI to document the clips, then I have a Mugascan, which will check my heart thoroughly to be sure I'm ready for chemo, then a pre-op regarding insertion of a port for the chemo. It will be under my skin in my upper chest, and they say no one will even know it's there. Beatty will put that in. Then, if all goes as planned chemo starts March 25. Am I scared? Yes, but I want to kill this son-of-a-bitch.
My chemo will be once a week for 12 weeks. After that it moves to every 3 weeks for another 12 weeks. Along the way, there will be numerous tests to see how I'm doing. After chemo, assuming this works and the big tumor shrinks, Dr. Beatty will pluck it out, then I'll have to undergo radiation to kill any leftover cancer cells.
I will lose my hair. It's a given. It pisses me off because it looks so pretty now, but I found out yesterday my insurance covers 70 percent of a wig, because it's considered a prosthetic! Yay! One nurse sort of pissed me off yesterday. I heard that you're not supposed to cut your nails during chemo. Chemo compromises your immune system, so you have to be really careful not to cut yourself or be near sick people. So, I asked her, and she said that wasn't true. So, I asked her if it was okay then to keep getting my nails done while in chemo, and she was real snippy with me, went and asked Dr. Kaplan, and came back and said no. I explained to her that my nails are not acrylic, which I know is toxic, they are gel. She dismissed the conversation as unimportant, and I said, look, I'm going to lose my hair, can't I at least have my nails done? She started blabbing again and I just walked away. Christina, my lovely nail tech, is not going to cut me. She hasn't yet. And I saw her last night, and she does plenty of nails on cancer patients. So fuck the bitchy nurse with dishwater blonde hair and ugly nails! I'm a girl, and would like to maintain some dignity throughout this ordeal!